Bart Train Love

I met you @ Bart
Those sexy eyes
Eccentric and unique
They looked to be the pair of someone I once knew
Gemini
Gem in eye
You enticed me with your words
Slowly I was drawn in
I had to catch my breath
Sexy as sin
I was hanging on your every line
You had me
And just as I was about to exhale
Just as I was about to accept
The train came to an abrupt stop
My stop

91703

From 2 different worlds
Two hearts connected & created unity
Our pains made us ONE
uniquely intrigued
A remarkable man, I thought
Guess the joke was on me
You came like a thief in the night
Stole all my happiness from me
Torn between two worlds, U left me
My pain then separated & divided us
Now I sit here lonely
In anticipation of your arrival
Although consciously knowing you’ll never return
Because your heart now belongs to another

Unsure
Confused
Frustrated
Almost fed up
Loves makes me do a lot of crazy things
Love makes me feel so damn good
That I can’t help but be naïve
I love you & u love me, is this true?
@ times I feel misused and abused
u sound so convincing when u say “I love you”
I can’t take this shit
Unsure of what to do
Because I know I love you
Confused with all the games
Frustrated at what I feel inside
Almost fed up, thinking of leaving you
Then u catch me by surprise
Stealing my heart, filing it just enough
So to me everything appears fine
I got to get pass this & come back 2 my senses
Cause all this rocking is making me sick
Sick of this, sick of that, sick of you

Ahhh

Simplistic
Lovely butterflies float about lovely skies
lovely
Powerful
Full of power
My favorite element
Waves
Crashing
Water ever flowing

Chocolate

What's the fuss?
Women go crazy for
I finally figured the buzz
Enticing a sweet and smooth treat
Dark n lovely
Ultra scumptous... dillyumptious

Cancerous Sin

I fell into the arms of
Deception & sin, knowingly
Nothing was unconscious about my decision
I was well aware of the risks I was taking
I was careless
It felt so good
Sent chills up my spine
Brought tears to my eyes
It was crazy and I went crazy every time
But my sins were cancerous
And soon malignant pains arrived
With every chill and every tear
My insides were deteriorating
My cancer with whom I sinned
Destroyed me

One day alone
What is that?
Loneliness
Why does it creep upon you?
Like a thief
Shattering your very existence
Such power
Such presence

it's simple you know
what can and can not be
the complexity of the matter
excites and frights me
you came to me on 2 occassions
and challenged my whole life perspective
if it is was wrong... it is right

I struggle with . . .
Being
In & out of love
With you
With you there is so much pain
But to lessen the pain
Would be to erase the pleasure
The concepts are intermingled
One can not exist without the other

March 16, 2006

I love you
That's all I keep thinking
I love you
And it's all that seems to matter
I love you
But you give me the blues
I love you

I miss you
@ times i wish i could 4get you
this house isn't quite a home without you
staring about these walls
trying to revist the lie
but you are now gone from me

Something of a friend
Empowering and daring
In a sense we were kin
Not tied through blood or family
Kindred spirits
A love unlike any ever known to me
So forbidden and taboo
To be in your pressence is fleeting
You lift me to the clouds
Floating in your essence
It's as if destiny played it's hand

I don't accept what you have to offer
Yet I keep you around only at a distance
I guess I find security in the irregularity
The ups & downs
Of cat and mouse

Unavoidable Tragedy

At times it still seems so unreal to me
Sitting in a reminiscent mood
Floating on clouds of love's past
Thinking it was inevitable
Things would've always ended upon this path
Love began and never completely recovered
From the tumultuous path

AM

Monday morning
Reality creep in and I was faced with the consequences
Of last nights actions

. . . .

It never occured to me
That a love as passionate as this
Could exist between us two
Who could've known
We'd be here, you & I
In this moment
In this place
At this time
In this life
Existing on a parallel level
I've known you for some time
Had the pleasure to watch you grow
Live
Mature
Change
Evolve

Resembling the life of a butterfly
Life began as a worm
Shifting to a cocoon
Progressing to a beautiful butterfly

I've never loved anyone as initmately as you
This connection could never exist with another
I've felt your pain, sadness, loss and grief
Thick as thieves
Kindred spirits
A friendship formed into an unbreakable bond
I've always loved you

But do you notice?

I've attempted countless measures
To get a glimpse of your affection
So many things I've changed
To be more appeasing to your senses
Have you noticed?
Skin soft and succulent
Sweet perfume
To entice your senses
Did you notice me?
Secretly watching you
Studying your movements
Did you notice me
Slightly brush up against your shoulder
Did you capture the heat radiating within
I am so seduced by you
I love everything about you
Everything that makes you unique
I believe you were God's gift to me
But...
Do I exist in your mind
Do you share similar thoughts
You inspire & light a fire within me
I know the you that is absent to everyone else
I know who you really are
The true you
The self that's kept hidden
I see past the guise
And I love you
Just as you are
raw & uncut
A diamond in the rough
And I'll love you til the end of time

Being Shy...

I'm shy
It's something I can't deny
Why. . . no one or I will ever know
But everytime you walk by my heart begins to glow
Still I'm shy...
So fear overpowers my thirst
Left blushing and fussing
Time passes
I'm crushing...
The object of my desire passes me
I can never seem to clutch
Is he even noticing me
Lost with a feeling of despair
Wishing he'd meet me at that common ground
But he's unaware of my preoccupation with him
Maybe one day I'll walk over to him
But who knows when these thoughts will become a reality

HipNaTika, by Paradise

(This is a piece that is very near and dear to my heart. It was written by an exceptional poet who is most commonly known as Paradise...)

She's a Living Doll
God has opened up his Treasure Chest
And given me a new toy to play with
The Universe's newest & favorite model
Fallen into my arms from the sky
Like an Angel who slid down the spiraled Milky Way
From seven heavens high
So exotic
She's like a drug - hipnotic
A Hoodoo Doll
The Voodoo Starchild of my Soul
I feel like I've struck Girly Gold
I've never had this feeling before
Not being able to pull myself away
Wanting more and more
When I pull her string
Oh Dear God
She opens her mouth
And says the most amazing things
Astounding
She sends me words with wings
Every time she speaks
Every time she spells
I am drawn deeper into her spell
And she moves deeper into my dreams
Clothing herself in the fabric of my being
Going through my poetry
Like she's on a shopping spree
In my blood stream
She swims and swings her tips
Puckers her lips
Kissing and singing
In my inner Ballrooms
On my chest behind my nips
She jiggles and gyrates her hips
In her sentences and in my veins
She swangs
So I sentence her for life
With my sentences I sentence her for life
In the Heart of Paradise
She is an Irresistable Force
And I am an Immoveable Object
Who never wants to meet her
Because I have placed her on too high a pedestal
I have turned her into my Fantasy Island Girl
And I fear she could never live up to my
Ridiculously high expectations
And worse
I could never live up to hers
She's a beautiful living doll
That I communicate with via electronics everyday
She's closer to me than breathing
Yet so far away
Nevertheless the sexiness is so great
And the chemistry so magnetic
So Insanely wonderful and wonderfully insane
So casually intense and hyperkinetic
That I never want to meet her - ever
Until she...

(c) 2-6-08, by Paradise

#13

It transpired in the middle of the night
Perhaps unconsciously
Or maybe in the form of a dream
But nonetheless
I envisioned you
Lying next to me
Stroking me
And your hands became mine
My hands became you
You traced the contours of my silhouette
And you took me
Each moment heightened the other
And as I reached my peak
It appeared to me
That I
Was the only one there

#12

I woke up this morning feeling rather down
I was real distraught about my life and felt like it was going no where really fast
and then i was like
WAIT A MINUTE
Hold up
I've accomplished alot
And I expect to do so much more

Thank you Lord
for all the wisdom and knowledge you have bestowed upon me
Knowing without you I wouldn't have made it here today

Of all the things I've had to endure, and overcome
I thank you

because without it all
the good times and bad
I wouldn't be the person I am today.
I wouldn't be ME

Without it I don't know what I'd be doing today
I regret nothing
and I'm moving forward with confidence
and faith that it can only get better from here

I'm looking forward to what the future holds
the good and the bad
because my obstacles have made me stronger

#11

If you...

needed

desired

and

wanted

me

things would be different

if you...

loved

respected

&
appreciated

me

you would've been there

if you...

cared

&
lived

4

me

we'd still be together

if you...

listened

saw

&

sought

me

you would've known

if you...

thought of

believed in

& were honest

with

me

i'd still love you

Reflections (#10)

I lye awake in bed

thinking

laying there

next to you

thinking

loving the way your body feels up against mine

loving the way i get a tingle up and down my spine

as you kiss me

my neck

my shoulder blades

loving the way it feels

thinking

can this last forever

thinking

loving the idea of

you

&

I


you & I

me & you

us

you are what love means to me

ineffable (#9)

You are everything I thought was never possible
You are everything I thought a man could never be
You pulled me outside of my body
Outside of this world

You eliminate all of the pain and sorrow
Essential to my existence
An unrestrained love affair
You made love real to me
My heart flutters at the thought of you

You mean everything to me
You complete me
You fill the void

When I'm with you
Nothing else matters

God thought of me when he made you

Love me forever
Leave me never

You made love to me in ways unspeakable
You took me to places outside of this world

You made love to me
Without ever touching me
You seduced my soul

I craved every aspect of you
Addicted to you

#8

Just waking up in the AM
Time to thank God
Rejuvenated & Refreshed
Ready

#7

I find myself
more often than not
thinking of you
nothing complex or abstract in subject
always wondering if thoughts of me appear in your mind as often as mine
it is as if i saw you yesterday
and felt the warmth of your caress
the scent of you still lingers
you have me captivated

The Deceiver (#6)

The Deceiver
Who knocks upon my door
A look out the peephole
There is no one in sight
Yet the knocking persists
Knock, knock, knock
Louder and with much force
Who is there
The voice is one of famillarlarity
He calls to me to answer
I refuse his pleas
and footsteps soon falter
Has he left?
Hopefully
The phone begins to ring
Ring. Ring. Ring.
The caller appears "UNKNOWN"
I'm tempted not to answer
For I know it is He
Who often attempts to deceive me

Meticulous (#5)

I sent him a text
It was late that night
To let him know
I was thinking of him
Wow thinking of him
How random
He is like
Something of a dream to me
The egotistical one
The seducer. . .

#4

Insanely I wait for you
Expecting something different
Than what you've given me so many times before
Insanely
You are here again
Invading my thoughts... exciting dormant desires
An invitation so tempting
Insanely I expect a different you
But you are only you and I am not that me
Evolution revealed new expectations
I accept you for who you are
and with that acceptance
I understand we could never be...

#3

I sat in the bathroom
feet flat on the floor
what has become of me

#2 of 30

Sometimes I feel as though
Sometimes I see it as
Often times I would like things to be
If it were a picture I painted
However that's not reality

30in30

I decided to take the 30 poems in 30 days challenge... so here it goes// So far I've gotten up to 11... whooo

#1

Provoked
on purpose
but not for the purpose I intended